Growing

It's that time of year when, if you pay attention, you will notice Spring.  Trees are beginning to bud, green shoots are poking their leaves through the cold, wet ground.  On the Wiccan calendar today marks the beginning of Spring.  It is a time when we begin manifesting all that we have been planning during the cold, winter months.  During class this weekend, I wrote a little something about my relationship to God.  It is my wish for manifestation.

Grandmother, you are a funny one.  I'm sorry it's so hard for me to listen.  So hard for me to understand.  I want to hear your wisdom.  Great Mother, please help me to be open, to listen and to understand.  You have told me that to reach the center is not easy and does not happen in a straight line.  You have told me that the path is like a river.  Still and quiet, then fast and raucous.  I get close to you, then move away.  You have shown this to me so many times.  You have told me that the path would be less painful if I understood that finding you is not simple and that my path to you is unique.  My path is not to be defined by anyone, but you.  If I hear a song in the flap of a crow's wings or the rhythm of leaves in the wind--that is you.  If I find healing in the hidden lake of Taos Mountain, it is you.  If you are in the Egyptian dance or the wall I face during zazen or the playful eyes of my nephews, I do not need to deny you.  I do not need to keep you in check or hidden.  I can bring you into the world.  Your voice wants to be heard and Lady, I assure you, it can be heard through me.  Whether through my pen or song or hands or dancing feet.  I want to birth You into this world the way you have birthed me.  You did not make me an abandoned, then found child for nothing.  Goddess, I accept this path as mine.  I accept that I can be a healer.  I accept that I can write your wisdom through my own story and memories.  Goddess, when you disappeared from my inner landscape I was terrified.  I thought I had lost you, but you merged into me.  You are everywhere inside of me.  When I found you within my heart, you did not hesitate, you went directly into my every cell.  We birthed each other.  Lady, help me hear your voice so I can heal this wound in the fabric of creation.  On your path, we heal each other with our stories.  And so I walk.  And so it is.